I couldn’t help myself — the title had to be cheesy, okay?
I had an IUD inserted this morning, and the cramps are just fantastic now. I also learned a while ago that I have a tilted uterus, and upon telling the doctor, she said, “That’s okay, that just means it’ll be a little more…”
“Don’t worry about it!”
Yeah, I knew it would hurt more because of it.
It was a great laughable moment in the doctor’s office.
The thing is, the risk of perforating my uterus is a little higher since it’s a tilted uterus, too. She’s a very experienced doctor and has done IUD insertions plenty, and since inexperience on the doctor’s part is the number one cause of perforation, I felt great about that. But the symptoms of perforations are a lot of bleeding and painful cramps that worsen after insertion.
Naturally, when two hours after my insertion the cramps worsened like hell and I had to pop a couple more ibuprofen pills in order to function, I got worried.
I called the pharmacy. Apparently the cramps can happen not just day of, but for up to four days. They should be improving though, and from what I can tell, they are… but I have still been needing drugs to handle the pain, so I can’t be sure.
Tomorrow, G is hosting a role-playing game in the afternoon, so all his friends and one of mine will be over. I decided to try it out this time — last year he hosted one and I didn’t participate — so I’ll need to be present and functioning.
I told G I don’t want his friends to know about the cramps.
I wanted to take ibuprofen right away instead of waiting to see.
And then I realized something. I’m not comfortable with telling his guy friends that I have cramps. Why the hell not, you ask? Because apparently all this time, I’ve been living with the feeling that a woman having her period is not a topic for conversation. It’s inappropriate.
Well, fuck that!
I can’t believe I felt that way. I didn’t even realize I did until now. I mean, ladies don’t really go around telling everybody that they’re on their period in the first place — it’s just generally not something you bother telling people. (Unless you need a pad, or tampon, or an Advil from a fellow woman, of course. We’ve all been there.)
But going out of our way so that people don’t know about it seems kind of silly. I mean, half the world’s population has a menstrual cycle. Yet, I’ll still tell guys I’m sore from the gym instead of just “I have cramps.” I say “I’m really tired,” or “I’m not really feeling well,” to avoid socializing.
And wanting to change my routine so that guys don’t have to hear about it is another thing.
I always wait until the pain is too much to handle before I take any medicine. It’s just what I like to do — I like to know that I absolutely need it, because I’d rather not take it if I don’t have to. But if G’s friends are coming over tomorrow, my first instinct is to take medicine right away so that I don’t have to appear unwell — or worse, say that I have cramps.
One of the reasons I think women don’t share that they’re on their period is because then suddenly, men think they need to walk on eggshells around us. Yes, I’m speaking from experience. I stopped saying anything about my period because of it.
The stereotype of all women turning into angry crazy people at that time of the month is there because of our hormonal instability at that time, but for real, if someone is a bit emotional, no matter what time of the month or what gender they are, you’re going to bloody well be nice to them. So just be normal, for goodness’ sake!
I don’t want to say, “I have cramps,” and have all the guys be scared of me.
Seriously. I am a normal person. Besides, PMS happens before the period. Once the period starts, it’s over. It’s not like it happens the entire time, at least not for everyone. (Cramps and headaches do still happen for me on the first and second day, respectively, but by that point emotions are in check and everything’s fine.)
But to have guys look like they have no idea what to say if I say I have cramps tells me we don’t talk about this stuff enough.
Yes, women have periods.
We know this. So what’s the big deal? Why all the hiding? It’s the same with birth control — women always have to be discreet about their pill if they take it at night, even though every guy knows what it’s for. My first impulse was to hide that I got an IUD. But why? It’s perfectly normal!
If you’re one of the women who doesn’t bother hiding, props to you, lady. It’s time for me to join you.
Tomorrow, if I have cramps and I need a breather, I’m not going to hide it, even if it’s from the IUD and not my period.
It’s time to start talking about periods openly.
Because a lot of men out there need to know that all they need to is be normal.
If they are uncomfortable, then that is my opportunity to open the door and get them talking, and I will talk about the IUD and the period if the opportunity presents itself. And if they’re not, then yay!
We’re getting somewhere, world.
How do you deal with the topic of menstruation and birth control? Does it make you uncomfortable? Are you very open about it? Let me know in a comment below!
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